I have what appears to be a little puzzle champ on my hands. Jude has taken to jigsaw puzzles just like his Momma (my mom tells me I was doing 1000 piece ones by age 5/6). He never seemed to care much for the simple wooden peg ones so it was kind of surprising how quickly he picked up on the regular 25-30 piece rectangular inter-locking ones. He's got a ton of them now just to keep it interesting and he does about 5 of them a day on average (currently his favorite play item).
Part of me isn't at all surprised because he is a little problem solver by nature and we've encouraged that kind of thinking in him every chance we gotten. We emphasize team work and brainstorming which are skills I personally feel are invaluable in small children. I think far too many parents think that Kindergarten is there to teach their children these and other social skills and so fail to do it themselves when the child is truly eager to lean them. Think of how much easier it would be for your child to transition into a classroom setting if they're already confident that they can work with their peers and tackle any problem they might face. That kind of confidence is what sets them up for success, not knowing their ABC's. While that skill is handy there is actually little proof that being able to read prior to Kindergarten gives them any real advantage (not counting super genius babies that are just by nature more advanced cognitively which is a different issue), however, ask any teacher if there's an advantage to your child being socially competent at an early age and you're not likely to hear a "nay" from the bunch.
"What is social competence?" you may well ask. It's rather simple to start with; sharing, taking turns, helping others, manners (including please, thank you, excuse me, sorry, asking instead of taking etc), problem solving, emotion recognition (being able to tell how someone is feeling through their expression and demeanor) and empathy. To name a few.
Most of these things you can easily teach by example, and the rest just take a few extra mins when dealing with conflicts your child encounters while in your care. For example, we have a very specific technique we use with Jude when it comes to teaching empathy. Any time he does something to hurt anyone, even accidentally, we stop, ask him to look at the other person, to look at their face or if they're crying identify that. We ask him what he thinks that means, what made them feel that way, etc. Then we ask him what he thinks would help make them feel better. It use to be he'd say a hug or kiss but more recently he's started to really problem solve it. A month or so ago he sprayed his Papa with the hose, after being told not too, and Papa got pretty upset. When they came inside Jude was claiming he didn't mean to do it (which was up for debate) and I told him it did not matter. Regardless of his purpose the result is the same, Papa is wet and upset. I reminded him of how just the previous night a friend of his had gotten him wet (on accident) and how upset he'd been about it. I asked him what he thought he could do to make Papa feel better and the says "A towel!" Great idea! So the boys went off to get a towel and Jude helped Papa dry off. I was super proud of him for that. And proud of us for taking the time when things like that arise and give us the opportunity to really teach him how to interact with others.
Another thing I do with him, have been doing for some time now, is the happy face sad face game. It's not really a game, but whatever. We simply make exaggerated faces and identify the emotion that goes with them; happy, sad, mad, etc. We've added more as he gets older and learns more complex emotions. I feel this is very important, for boys especially because of their inability to identify emotion in others due to biological reasons. Read Inside The Teen Brain for more info on that. Helping your child learn to differentiate fear and anger could help stave off a lot of unnecessary arguments in their future. I want Jude to have every advantage possible. How you treat others is often far more important that how smart you are. Hiring managers will tell you that they'd rather have an employee that can be part of the team without struggle than one that is abrasive but with a slightly higher IQ.
Social competence is KEY.
The other things I mentioned are all pretty straight forward. The important thing to remember is that while it may seem like a pain to force an issue with your child, like if they take a toy from another child but the other child doesn't seem to care, do it anyway. Take every opportunity to teach them. Maybe that child doesn't care, but the next one likely will, and teaching them to ask first is important regardless. Teaching them to say they're sorry is another pit fall if you fail to teach them WHY they say it. "I'm sorry" often becomes a get out of jail free card because children learn that if they say it they're no longer in trouble... but they don't really mean it so what have you really taught them? "I didn't mean it" is another cringe worthy statement. Okay, so, you didn't mean to hurt that kid but guess what? You still did, and the result is the same to the one with the bloody knee.
I'm running out of steam so I'll leave it with this. You're child can be a genius but that doesn't guarantee their success, or their happiness in life. Some of the most intelligent people are the most unhappy simply because they aren't very good at interacting with others. Sometimes this is an issue of mental problems, sometimes it's not (we know that most true geniuses suffer from some form of mental or developmental illness or another), it doesn't mean that we as parents shouldn't be doing everything we can to teach them the skills that will make it easier for them to be socially competent.
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